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  I flick on the television and watch the sports network for a while, but after about an hour, I think of India and what Marina said, about her being so lonely and lying in her bed all alone and feel like talking to her all of a sudden.

  JON: Are you still awake? I can't sleep. I'm always hyped up before a big presentation.

  After a moment, she replies.

  INDIA: I always have trouble sleeping the night before, too.

  JON: It's late but do you feel like going for a walk?

  There's a pause.

  INDIA: No. I really need to just shut off the light and go to sleep. I'll probably just be tired. If I went for a walk now, I'd really be awake. But thanks anyway.

  JON: Okay. I think I'll go for a quick run. I need to exhaust myself physically if I'm going to sleep. See you in the morning.

  INDIA: Good night.

  I put my cell away and do exactly what I said – I go for a run down the street where the hotel is located, needing to burn off some excess energy before I'll be able to sleep. The night before a big meeting is often stressful, even though I'm sure India will do a magnificent job. I need to completely exhaust myself, and my little bout of self-abuse earlier in the day wouldn't be enough.

  So I run. I run in the dark, the only sounds accompanying me the distant sound of the freeway and the noise of my breathing and my feet beating the pavement. After about twenty minutes, I stop near a bus shelter and sit on the bench, catching my breath while I adjust my running shoe laces, which have come undone. I check my watch and decide I've done enough for the night, so I run back to the hotel, taking the same route.

  I glance up at the hotel and run my eyes up the side, mentally counting off the floors so I can find our floor and our rooms. I figure out which room is mine and which is India's and am surprised to see her curtains open and her figure silhouetted in the window. The drapes have been opened and she appears to be staring out at the city around the hotel.

  She looks lonely.

  My watch reads fifteen past eleven and she can't sleep either. Why she refused to go on a walk with me, I don't understand. We used to run together back in the day. She said it helped her sleep, so I can't figure out why she wouldn't come with me.

  That kiss must have really freaked her out.

  That's not a good thing. The last thing I need is for there to be any tension between us. I'll have to clear things up as soon as possible if I want our partnership to flourish.

  I return to my room and after sitting in front of my television while my sweat dries, I have another quick shower and go to bed. My last thoughts as I lie in the darkness are not about the presentation in the morning, but of India and what Marina told me about her being lonely.

  I'm too busy to be lonely, surrounded all day and most of the evening with my team, working on Pacifica. I'm never alone, and neither is India. In fact, she and I are almost always together, working away side by side in meetings and on various parts of the Defense Department project.

  How can India be lonely?

  Chapter 5

  INDIA

  The morning goes smoothly, from the time I wake up until the presentation at the Pentagon is over and Jon and I are in the car, driving back to the hotel. I was on point, and the general who organized the meeting was polite, interested, and encouraging, asking all the right questions and sounding extremely impressed with Pacifica's new HUD for combat.

  Jon's super stoked on the drive back to the hotel, and I can almost feel his happiness while we sit in the back of the limo and watch the Washington scenery go by.

  "What now?" he asks, almost twitching with energy. "I feel like celebrating."

  "It's only noon," I say, infused with his excitement, but realizing that we can't celebrate. "Our flight leaves in three hours. We should pack up, check out and head to the airport. We can eat in the lounge there. They have great food. Plus champagne."

  "Champagne it is." He looks over at me, his eyes softening. "You were great."

  I smile, genuinely pleased that it went well. "I think they liked the presentation."

  "You were great," he says again, taking my hand and squeezing it. I squeeze back and then, when he holds on a little too long, I gently slip my hand out of his and take out my cell.

  It's not that I don't appreciate his show of affection. It's just that after the other night's kiss, it seems like he's getting a bit too touchy-feely with me.

  He says nothing, but I can see him glance out the limo's window, his hand remaining on the seat between us. Now I feel like a bitch for taking my hand out of his first, but I don't want him to think we're just going to fall in bed and fuck out of convenience.

  "We should party when we get back home."

  I glance over. "I didn't sleep well, so I'll be taking the rest of the day off. We have the party at Marina's Saturday night. We can party then."

  "That's right," he says and nods, rubbing his square, scruffy jaw. "She had me re-do that stupid questionnaire and wants to set me up with a perfect date."

  "You should let her match you up," I say, knowing that Marina thinks Jon is a hard nut to crack. "If she can nail you, she can find a mate for anyone."

  "Why would you say that?" he says, his voice sounding all insulted. I can't quite tell if he's being serious or joking.

  "You're a confirmed bachelor. No one woman would ever be enough for you."

  "What?" He sits up a bit, grinning at me, and now I know he's joking. "Me? No woman good enough for me?"

  I laugh at the expression of mock-surprise on his face. "Yes, you. No one has ever broken your heart. We all know that you don't have one."

  I wink at him but his face falls and the grin is gone.

  "That's not true," he says softly. "My heart was broken."

  I lean closer because maybe, for the first time since I've known him, I might learn something truly and deeply personal about him. Sure, I heard the story of how Dee broke his heart, sending him a 'Dear Jon' letter while he was deployed, but nothing more. He avoids talking about anything too personal.

  "My heart was broken by Mary-Louise Stevens in third grade," he says, his grin returning. "I wanted to kiss her and she said no. Since then, no one's gotten close to my cold black heart because I ripped it out and threw it away."

  Nope.

  "You’re a bastard, you know that?" I say and lightly punch his shoulder. He mock-grimaces and rubs his bicep. "Here I thought you were going to confess to me all about your broken heart.

  He laughs out loud at that. "Never. Never let them see any weakness."

  "Like you have a weakness."

  "I have weaknesses. Several."

  "What?" I say in disbelief. "You were a soldier. You do Iron Man competitions. You work like a machine. You put in ten- and twelve-hour days six days a week. You demand punctuality and total preparation on the part of your staff and you're even harder on yourself. You skydive. You base jump. You surf and snowboard. You don't smoke and you only drink when you party." I smile because even though I'm trying to give him a hard time, I actually do admire him. "You're just a top performer. I don't see any weaknesses. You even take your vitamins every day." I raise my eyebrows, because I'm always ribbing him about his concern for fitness and nutrition.

  "I sound insufferable."

  "You sound like a man with no weaknesses."

  "Oh, but I assure you, I do. They're just secret."

  Now it's his turn to wag his eyebrows. He tries to hide a grin behind his hand.

  "Would these weaknesses shock me?" I say, curious now what he considers to be weaknesses.

  "You might be surprised."

  Now that was suggestive. Is he kinky?

  "Are you Christian Grey in disguise?"

  He laughs at that. "I'll never tell."

  I lean back and glance out at the people on the street, my mind whirling to figure out if he's joking about his secret weaknesses and what I'd think of him if he was kinky. Some kinks I could appreciate, and might even be into them, but o
thers?

  Not so much.

  I've never heard anything about him being kinky, but it's not like I follow his sex partners around to find out what he likes and dislikes. He picks up women from bars, so I doubt he could be a sadist who liked to tie women up and whip them. If he was, he'd be much more secretive about his partners.

  He's just playing with me.

  "You're full of it."

  "You'll never know either way unless you try," he says, an evil but playful gleam in his eyes. He swipes his tongue over his bottom lip suggestively. It makes my flesh throb in a very annoying way.

  I glance away, unable to keep from smiling. "I don't want to know," I reply but of course that's a bald-faced lie. I do want to know. I'm totally curious.

  He's grinning and when our eyes meet again, he laughs out loud. "Come on," he says, his voice chiding. "I was just kidding. I'm in a good mood and want to celebrate. That was a good morning."

  "It was. I'm happy, too."

  We drive the rest of the way to the hotel and each return to our rooms to pack and get ready for checkout. Then, we take the car to the airport and after checking in, we find the Virgin executive lounge and sit at a table, eating the gourmet food and drinking some actual champagne.

  "To Pacifica." Jon raises his glass of champagne.

  "To Pacifica," I reply and raise my glass, too.

  Our flight is routine, if very comfortable and after we land and get our bags, our car takes us to my apartment.

  Jon hops out to help me with my bag, and walks me to the front door.

  "Well, I'm going home to shower and unpack, then I'm going back to the office to go over some numbers."

  I turn to him and frown. "Don't you ever just take a night off?"

  "Saturday night. I'm going to Marina's. I guess I'll see you at the office tomorrow?"

  I shrug. "I'm taking tomorrow off. I've put in a lot of late nights these past two weeks. I'm exhausted."

  I force a smile at him. I know he thinks the week we just put in is child's play compared to the conditions he lived in while deployed to Afghanistan, but I'm truly wiped.

  "So, I won't see you until Saturday night at Marina's."

  "If you need me, you can text me. Good night," I say, making sure I'm nowhere close to him in case he gets it in his head to kiss me goodnight again. But he's probably realized that was a mistake, and stays his distance.

  I enter my house, glad to be back home so I can collapse on the sofa and watch some Netflix.

  Marina texts me later.

  MARINA: How did it go?

  INDIA: Great. I think we may have clinched the deal.

  MARINA: Fantastic. Oh, by the way, I've got a match for Jon. She's coming to the party Saturday night.

  INDIA: Yeah, he told me he re-did the questionnaire. Who's the lucky gal?

  MARINA: I ran him through the system and came up with this woman who's dying to meet him. Especially when she saw his picture. You have to admit most of us would do Jon, if we were into one-night stands. He looks like a cleaned-up surfer-Ragnar.

  INDIA: Who is she? I mean, Jon will fuck anything with a pretty face. I'm totally curious. I'd love to read his answers…

  MARINA: You know I could never reveal his answers.

  INDIA: I'm just kidding.

  I feel a jolt of emotion at the thought Marina might have truly found a perfect match for Jon.

  MARINA: She's perfect for him. She was a swimsuit model and now she works as a beautician at a local shop downtown. She's beautiful.

  A silly stab of jealousy goes through me. I try to tamp it down.

  INDIA: A swimsuit model? She does sound perfect for him. LOL

  MARINA: I tell you, I got this questionnaire honed. I want you to do it again, now that I've tweaked it. I'll send it right away. Do it now, before you go to bed. I want to see who I come up with this time.

  INDIA: Send away. I'll do it, but I hope you come up with someone better than Dr. Thomas the Blowhard.

  MARINA: I will. I'll come up with the perfect match for you.

  INDIA: Forever optimistic.

  MARINA: I am. Goodnight!

  I get an email with a link to the questionnaire and so I open it up, despite being tired. I fill it out and then submit it. I don’t see anything different from the one I filled out before, but who knows? I can't remember all the questions.

  Then I lie on the sofa, pull a blanket up almost covering my head, and listen to an episode of Seinfeld.

  The last thing I remember is Neumann muttering something under his breath.

  I spend the entire next day lying on the sofa, eating microwave popcorn and catching up on some recorded episodes of Orange Is The New Black.

  Jon texts me later in the afternoon and I'm surprised he hasn’t texted me sooner with some issue or other. I rarely take a day off and when I do I never get through a full twenty-four-hour period without him texting.

  I hear my cell ding at around four thirty. Right on schedule.

  JON: Where are you? I need you. We've got a dozen requests for more info from General Neilson.

  I sigh and chew a fingernail. Jon knows full well that my assistant Caroline can provide the general with any information he needs.

  INDIA: Ask Caroline. She'll do it right away. That's why I have an assistant.

  There's a pause.

  JON: Oh, yeah. Okay.

  An hour and fifteen minutes passes.

  JON: Have you eaten? I haven't had any food since this morning.

  I sigh, smiling to myself. The man eats like a horse when he eats, but then he practically starves himself the rest of the time.

  INDIA: I had a nice bowl of pho delivered from the Vietnamese restaurant down the street. I'm good.

  JON: Oh, damn. Why didn’t you text me? I would have come and joined you. You know I love pho.

  INDIA: It's my day off. I'm supposed to not have anything to do with the office on my day off.

  JON: Dream on.

  I laugh because he's right. It never happens. Usually, I end up zipping over to the office to take care of some emergency. I’m surprised that no one called me earlier in the day.

  INDIA: Those were your orders, Mr. CEO. You said that when we take a day off, we should turn off our cells and not accept texts.

  JON: That was aspirational. It wasn't meant to be achieved.

  INDIA: I'm trying my best to achieve it.

  JON: Okay. I'll leave you alone. Do you want me to come by with a beer?

  INDIA: That wouldn't be leaving me alone.

  JON: Ha ha. You got me. Good night.

  INDIA: Sleep tight.

  JON:

  About an hour later, Marina texts me and claims she has a new match for me and is arranging for us to meet at her party.

  INDIA: Isn't that awfully quick? I mean, I just filled out the questionnaire.

  MARINA: Trust me. This is a sure thing. His name is Evan. He's hot as hell. And he likes your pic and profile.

  INDIA: I don't remember creating a profile. You have to ask me about these things!

  MARINA: Hun, you gave me permission to create a profile and match you up with guys, remember? You gave me permission to arrange a first date. You can always decline, but this is important. Take a look at his pic and see what you think. Tell me he isn't right up your alley.

  I open the link to the guy's profile. Evan Moran. He's tall and dark and bearded. He looks really metrosexual, his moustache curled up on the ends. On closer examination, his dark hair is cut short on the sides but long and slicked back in a very trendy man bun.

  She's got to be kidding…

  INDIA: A man bun?

  MARINA: He's got a masters in Political Science and is doing his Ph.D. at Stanford. He's vegan and likes jazz and grunge metal. He drives a Jeep and does Bikram Yoga.

  INDIA: Vegan? I'm a devoted meat eater. My favorite food is steak.

  MARINA: He's flexible about dating omnivores.

  INDIA: And hot yoga? You know I melt at room tempe
rature unless I'm beside a large body of water.

  MARINA: You're beautiful and sexy. He likes curvy women. He said yes as soon as he saw your pic.

  INDIA: If you think so…

  I pause for a moment, rethinking the whole business.

  INDIA: Maybe I shouldn't meet him at the party on Saturday.

  MARINA: Why? It's all arranged, hun.

  INDIA: Jon will eat him alive.

  MARINA: Jon will be too busy drooling over the swimsuit model beautician.

  I think back to the night Jon dropped me off.

  INDIA: Jon kissed me the other night. It was weird.

  MARINA: DANGER WILL ROBINSON! Do NOT hook up with Jon. It will mean the end of your business relationship. I know what I'm talking about.

  INDIA: I have no plans to hook up with him. He's not into relationships. He's a bonobo and likes to fuck every woman he meets. That's all. It's his natural mode of interaction.

  MARINA: You two have got to find partners and stop thinking that getting together will solve your problems.

  INDIA: We're not thinking of getting together. We're friends. Good friends. We're business partners.

  MARINA: Honestly, you can't get together with Jon, even if it would be easy and logical.

  INDIA: I know! Believe me, there's no intention on my part to hook up with Jon. It's the last thing I'm thinking about.

  MARINA: Don't go there. Seriously. Big mistake. Huge mistake.

  INDIA: Why do you think that?

  MARINA: Because he'll break your heart. You know I'm right…

  INDIA: Message received

  MARINA: Good. You need to meet my match for you. Give him a shot.

  I sigh, wishing I could say no, but I promised her I'd help her out. Besides, I want someone. I need a man.

  Badly.

  INDIA: Okay, but if things don't work out on this date, you have to give up and realize that either your app is wrong or there's something wrong with me.

  MARINA: There's nothing wrong with you that a nice hard man won't fix. ;) Your date is ripped on top of being very urbane. He does say he knows how to please a woman on his profile.